Archive for ‘anecdotes’

December 6, 2013

Technology means “Magic.”

by stryson

I finally feel free to admit it… I always desperately wanted to introduce my computer classes with this Strong Bad Email:

http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail143.html

I was pretty sure it wasn’t appropriate to do so, and that my kids would not understand most of the humor involved, but it continues to make me laugh, years later.

December 5, 2013

Throw-Back Thursday

by stryson

“Throw-Back Thursday” has become one of many trends floating around the internet, particularly facebook. For those of you unfamiliar with this concept, people make posts, generally ones with pictures,  that are from some time in the past and generally have nostalgic value with friends of theirs. I’ve gotten tagged in a few of these – including pictures from a dance studio I attended as a kid. I generally remain unmoved by internet fads (I swear, if one more person invites me to play Candy Crush, I’m going to quit facebook…), but I’m  into this particular one. In that spirit, here are some funny kids’ quotes that I’ve had sitting around since before I left the school.

I’m going to  attribute them to initials and the child’s age, for some added context. Enjoy.

From vocabulary homework, target words bolded:

“Some of the questions on the NJ ASK Test were incomprehensible, like  the ones that have letters plus numbers.” – GC, 14

“In the old days, smiths used anvils. Now cartoons use them.” – MG, 10

“I wonder how some surgeons deal with looking at innards all day without throwing up.” – MC, 11

“Many people used anvils back in medieval times, because their technology wasn’t exactly up-to-date, for they knew almost nothing.” – WN, 11

“Do you know, on an average day, I see one varmint in my household.” – SL, 10

… I don’t know that I want to see that house.

May 1, 2012

Gobble Gobble

by stryson

When talking about ethnicity in one of my classes, one student tried to tell me about his heritage…

Hey, I’m part Turkey!

… an honest mistake, and a good teachable moment for the suffix -ish. Still, hilarious.

April 30, 2012

Amusing Responses

by stryson

As I’ve mentioned before, I teach kids with specific communication difficulties, so I probably shouldn’t find some of their wordings as amusing as I do, but I also suppose it’s good to keep a light heart…

With that in mind, here are some amusing answers:

1. Who is Joe? How did he get to California?

Joe is an African American man who was a slave. He got to California by escaping the slavery place.

From vocabulary sentences:

appraising – measuring the worth of something

In math I am appraising with a watch.

forsake – to give up on or betray

The Ipod will never forsake his friend, the Ipad.

bounty – numerous good things

After homework, I get a bounty of TV.

 

 

April 4, 2012

Quotes before break

by stryson

I daresay I’m as fried as the kids. Spring break starts after dismissal tomorrow, and it cannot come soon enough!

To cheer us through the last twenty-four hours, here are some quotes. Enjoy!

 

“May I get a drink? I feel like a cactus.” – 4th grade boy

***

“Can I have funny? Because that’s what I am.” – request made by 4th grade boy when choosing words for a synonym game

***

“I’m not going to be here tomorrow.” –5th grade girl

“Why not?” -me

“I have to go to a mountain!” She cracks up. “I don’t even know what that means!”-5th grade girl

March 27, 2012

I’m baaaaack!

by stryson

Sorry for the radio silence as of late. March can be a tough time – conferences, objectives, report cards, and IEP/ISP meetings have swallowed much of my time. Working on my increasingly beautiful new home has taken up the rest.

The kids remain as hilarious as ever. Today, I received two different notes from fifth graders, each of them purposely made to look like they were trying to forge a note from their parents. No, I did not word that in an unnecessarily complicated manner. The part they found hilarious was making it obvious that they were the ones writing the note… making a big show during snack of writing it and of using bad grammar and spelling and whatnot.

The first went like this:

Please let me go to school. I need to learn about scientific proof about precipatation. I have a WEdding to go to so Ms. Trison please not forpoint.

From (—)

My reply, on the same piece of paper:

Dear (student’s name),

What???

From,

Mrs. Tryson

The second one read:

Dear Mrs tryson

do not Let me go to school today I have a dog apointment please not atte ym niotps today.

The explanation she gave for the second part was that she was trying to write the note backwards. It came out sideways.

My job is so surreal sometimes. I find myself uttering sentences that I never thought would come out of someone’s mouth. “Why are you dancing the hula in your chair?” “So you’re saying you’re secretly a squirrel.” “She has a wedgie, get over it.”

I’m looking forward to regaining my appreciation for the hilarity. As the overwhelming workload lightens, that should be more possible.

February 14, 2012

Sick day

by stryson

So, I’m sick. Sick enough to take two days off of work, which hardly ever happens. I went into school yesterday morning under the classic assumption, made at six a.m., that it was just a cold and that I’d feel better after being awake for an hour or so. That assumption was wrong.

By seven-thirty, I’d already text messaged my assistant director, asking him to get me a sub for the  day. I did my morning duty, got the sub oriented, and prepared to leave. One of my first period fourth graders overheard the sub tell me to get plenty of rest. So, naturally, as I walked out the door, he calls after me:

“Hey, Mrs. Tryson, rest in peace!”

I did take the time to explain, in my strangled-not-really-there-voice, that I appreciated the sentiment but that it wasn’t correct to phrase it that way. I was definitely chuckling on the inside, though.

I’m still home, and still run-down, and my voice really isn’t back yet. I’m sick of being sick!

February 7, 2012

Like, OMG.

by stryson

Well, folks, the day has finally come. This is what the answers in my sixth grade have come to:

4. How does Miss Harris react to Gilly?

Miss Harris is like OMG when she caught Gilly in the hallway.

 

February 7, 2012

Oh, my homeroom…

by stryson

Kid 1: Do you believe in Santa Claus?

Me: Of course I believe in Santa Claus.

Kid 2: Do you believe in harmony?

Me: Of course I believe in harmony.

Kid 3: What’s harmony? What’s harmony? What’s harmony? What’s harmony?

Me: When two notes sound nice together.

Kid 3: Well, that’s dumb. Of course harmony exists!

February 6, 2012

Superbowl

by stryson

Could we please have a policy that when your city/state/region is in the Super Bowl, you have off of school the next day? The kids are a wreck from all of the excitement, diet changes, and staying up late last night.

But, hey, go Giants!

By and large, it appears that the kids were also really unhappy with the halftime show. I know Madonna was way before their time, but it’s felt odd to hear them talk with vehemence about how “old” she is and how they felt she was a poor choice. Personally, I thought the show was okay, but not spectacular. That wasn’t for lack of trying on Madonna’s part; it just didn’t strike my fancy.

In any case, I’m looking forward to a calmer and quieter day tomorrow.